10 Absolutely Stupid Golf Fashions

1. Long Sleeve Dress Shirts

Lately, Phil Mickelson has been wearing these at tournaments. He looks like a rules official or some bored office worker that wants to pull off a quick nine after a long day toiling away in a cublicle. Even Phil the Thrill can't pull this look off, so puh-leeze, just wear a regular golf shirt. Another great and goofy Phil fashion statement is wearing a watch while playing. 

2. Flat Brim Caps

Unless you're trying to squeeze in a quick round before you attend a rap concert, please refrain from wearing these ridiculous looking lids.

3. All White From Head to Toe

If your desire is to look like an ice cream truck driver, house painter or tennis player at Wimbledon, by all means, show up at the golf course in all white.

4. High-Top Golf Shoes

You can thank Rickie Fowler for trying to introduce this fashion statement on to the golf course. Thankfully, it hasn't caught on. Unless you're an NBA golf fanatic like J.R. Smith or Stephen Curry, please leave your high-tops at home in your closet.

5. Camouflage Outfits

Maybe for Larry the Cable Guy or some deer hunter who just fell out of your tree perch onto the fairway, but the rest of us should not wear camouflage on the golf course. Same goes for bowling shirts, Hawaiian shirts and baseball and football jerseys.

6. Golf Sandals

Yes, you might be in the bunkers all day, but that still doesn't give you the right to play golf in sandals. If you like sandals so much, please take up beach volleyball or perhaps frisbee golf.

7. Matching Husband and Wife Outfits

This is the couple that has WAY too much time on their hands. Oh yeah, they also generally own a tricked up golf cart with sheepskin seat covers and a customized license plate that reads "Bob & Madge."

8. Oversized Golf Shirts

Hey, the 1980s called and they want these shirts back NOW.

9. Logos Gone Crazy

Nothing and I mean nothing is more annoying than the guy who shows up wearing a logo hat, shirt and pants. He's basically saying, "Hey guys, I played Pebble, Pinehurst and Bandon Dunes and went to the Masters and you poor slugs haven't been anywhere."

10. Cowboy Hats

I realize a cowboy hat provides more protection against the sun than a traditional golf cap, but unless you're a rancher rounding up some cattle or an urban cowboy looking for love in all the wrong places, I highly suggest leaving this legendary lid at home on the hat rack.

Top 10 Golf Fashion Don'ts

Golf fashion has evolved rapidly in the past few years.

I mean, just look at Rickie Fowler in his fluorescent outfits, John Daly in his Loudmouth pants and Hunter Mahan in his rapper style golf hats...

Let's face it, though, popular PGA Tour pros can get away with it.

Others can't.

Like these guys...

1. Wearing Your Shirt Out to Hide Your Gut--Nothing says, "Hey, I'm trying to camouflage my massive boiler/beer gut" like guy who wears his golf shirt over his belt.

2. Oversize Non-Golf Belt Buckle--Wearing a buckle sporting a skull or beer company logo might be more appropriate at Daytona Beach Bikefest. On the golf course, ya might want to tone it down a bit.

3. Cargo Shorts--If you're a college student, vacationer on a safari or ornithologist, you're welcome to wear cargo shorts. If you're on a golf course, not so much.

4. Golf Sandals--Can we just leave sandals to surfers. Just because you're in the bunkers all day, doesn't mean you have to sport this footwear.

5. Jeans--It's a great American fashion statement, but just not on the golf course. The fabric doesn't breathe well, there is no pocket room for golf balls, tees and markers and they make you look like a ranch hand with a golf club. Other than that, I guess they're ok, right?

6. Hawaiian Shirts--Please save these for luaus and backyard barbecues. They never looked good on Duffy Waldorf and they don't even look that great on Hawaii golf courses.

7. Visors--Please leave the visors to Brandt Snedeker, Phil Mickelson and Steve Spurrier.

8. Watches--Unless your "Phil the Thrill" scoring some big endorsement dollars for wearing one, you don't really need a watch to tell you how slow the group in front of you is moving.

9. Knickers--Should only be worn by those participating in a hickory stick tournament or by the goofy emcee at a charity golf tournament. Please leave the knickers (plus fours) in the closet.

10. Matching Hat and Shirt with Masters Logo--It's okay to wear a shirt or even hat separately, but when you wear both at the same time it screams: "Hey, I went to the Masters, you didn't, and you wish you could be me."